Blurring the Lines Between Work and Life
It’s been 10 years now, but you still haven’t found it.
At first you thought it was because you were a junior and you didn’t have the experience yet. And then you thought it may have been when you obtained the next promotion and you received that raise. And then you thought it was when you would be leading a team and were more respected by your peers. But here you are and you still haven't found that thing you were always told when you were younger.
"Do what you love, and you will never work a day in your life."
It doesn’t make sense though, you’re doing all the right things. You’ve followed your curiosities, you’re at a fast growing start up, there’s an abundance of opportunities and you’re the envy of your friends. But at the end of the day, work is still work.
In the moments you let your mind wander, you think “what am I missing?”.
"Do what you love, and you will never work a day in your life."
It seems so simple, and yet as time goes on you begin to believe it’s just another cliche that people say.
However, what if it wasn’t a cliche but we are only given half the equation when told to follow our passions?
Before revealing the missing variable, it's important to understand one thing. This is our biology, it is hardcoded into the software that we call our brain.
Our limbic brains; the oldest area in the muscle, is responsible for human-behaviour, decision-making and our feelings. It has no capacity for language. Whilst the newest part of our brains, the neocortex, is responsible for rational and analytical thought and does understand language.
In summary, we as humans are driven by why. Anytime we make a decision we don’t process the what; the facts. We process the why; the reason we would do it.
This creates a problem anytime you make a career decision based on what your passions are (the what), without considering a specific ‘why’. In this situation, your brain begins searching for reasons. Common answers become: the salary, the benefits, the prestige of the company, not because of the function itself, but what they provide.
Your brain interprets a higher salary as greater financial security which provides the feeling of comfort. It interprets benefits as additional luxuries which feels exciting. It interprets the prestige of the company as causing greater respect amongst peers creating a feeling of security as there’s less chance of exclusion. The fatal fallacy is all these reasons have nothing to do with the job itself, but ulterior motives that come as a result of the work.
It's through this lens that you can see that the true meaning of 'work' in the opening quote is any task you don't do for the inherent value you are creating, but for ulterior motives.
Therefore, the secret to never working a day again in your life is aligning the tasks you love with an underlying mission you love. This creates a reality where there’s no disparity between work and life. It has aligned to become one thing: life.
You don’t work for the salary, the respect you get from friends or the opportunities to grow in the future. You work for this mission, which is ultimately just your life.
You’ve blurred the lines.
The irony is by aligning these two things you will achieve greater financial security, greater respect and more room to grow than ever making one of them the sole reason for your decision.
For instance, if the key to financial security is to be paid well due to being one of the best at what you do. The key to becoming the best at what you do is through finding what feels like play to you but work for others. By doing this, you will inherently spend more time doing it, therefore improve faster than anyone who considers it work.
If the key to earning respect is being authentic, then there's no easier place to be authentic than surrounding yourself with people with shared loves. An old adage states, "to find who you love, do what you love", continues to ring true.
Similarly, for greater opportunities to grow, by framing your work around a mission you also empower your career, rather than constrain it.
How?
By orienting around a ‘why’ it provides you with greater depth and breadth. Depth as you master one skill and breadth as you move onto new challenges. For instance, providing clarity may start with writing, but evolve into recording videos, teaching or coaching. It provides the underlying thread across the careers we have across our lifetime. In contrast, by orienting your work around a skill, your path to growth is only through further mastering that skill, subsequently only achieving greater depth. Unless you want to cut the thread and start again.
By visualising this you can see how a career-based on ‘what’ creates a life where you have a series of jobs. Whereas a career-built on ‘why’ creates a narrative to your life.
So how do you find your mission?
Start by thinking of things you love doing, and proceed to ask why five or so times. For example:
What do you love doing?
Writing
Why?
It brings clarity
Why?
To write in a coherent way you need to understand the topic
Why?
Otherwise the readers won't understand
Why?
Because they are relying on me to educate them
Why?
Because I’m a trusted source of knowledge
Why?
Because I’m deeply passionate about educating others
Don't expect to it to be perfect the first time. This is something you will refine overtime. However, do you find yourself with goosebumps? Excited by the thought? Identifying with the statement? If not, continue to ask yourself why, or find another love to explore.
You may find that your love of teaching is really a love for growing confidence in students so they have a belief they can pursue their dreams. Your love of marketing is really a love for telling stories that will inspire customers to strive for a better life. Your love for construction is really a love for building the city of tomorrow.
Ultimately, any career is going to feel like work at times. There’s always going to be tasks that you don’t love but are required. The challenge is how distinct are the lines that separate your work from your life? If the key to making them blurred is a mission, what’s your mission?