Boy oh boy, woweee.
Shoutout to Amine for joining this week!
Without further ado:
What I Learnt This Week:
After Western medicine failed to provide any relief for my concussion besides “don’t do anything that makes symptoms worse”, I found myself turning to eastern medicine.
After acupuncture did what no other specialist, physio or GP could I became fascinated with learning more.
In short, the key difference between the Western and Eastern practises is Western medicine treats things in isolation while Eastern medicine treats the system.
For instance if five people go to a GP with a stomach issue and they’re all diagnosed with a stomach ulcer. The GP will prescribe all five people the same tablet treatment which is designed to remove the ulcer.
If the same five people go to an Eastern medical professional. The ulcer will be acknowledged but seen more as an effect, rather than the cause. The Eastern practitioner will take note of each individuals lifestyle: how much they sleep, what they do for work, how stressed they are, how much water they drink etc. Based on all this information, the eastern practitioner will gauge what in the system has gone awry and provide five different treatments. All with the intention of treating the same ulcer.
The key difference is while western medicine may treat the ulcer, the tablet may cause a disruption somewhere else in the body e.g. antibiotics is horrible for the liver and destroys your good gut bacteria. Whereas eastern medicine is designed to find balance within the system which in turn treats the ulcer and causes no further disruption.
Essay From Me: What’s Driving You?
There was no yelling or shouting, only disbelief.
The first and only fight me and my OG best mate ever found ourselves in. Well, a fight by the loose definition of the word, we didn’t throw hands and the whole scenario involved little more than an exacerbated discussion.
Oh, and me spitting the dummy and refusing a lift home from the gym.
The situation blew up following a sweat inducing gym session where it was likely a tie between who looked at themselves in the mirror more. I turned to ask him for a lift to my car which I’d left 40 minutes away. I’d been a responsible drunk the night before ubering home, leaving my car at the party.
To my shock, he refused to give me a ride.
You may be thinking I’m a sensitive bastard if this is all it takes for me to go off my rocker. For a long time that’s how it likely appeared to him (sorry mate).
However, twelve months later the real reason was unearthed in a coaching session.
It wasn’t the fact that he refused to give me a lift. It was the reason (or the lack of). As the 20 year olds we were, we were highly never busy. Our days revolved around partying, girls and recovering. If he said he was seeing a girl or partying, fair enough, duty calls. However, today was a recovery day and my mate was going home to watch TV.
I felt betrayed. I’m the type of person who would do anything for a friend if circumstances allowed it. I’d drive to the Blue Mountains if he told me he was too hungover but he needed to go because he’d heard the bacon and egg McMuffins from Maccas tasted better out there.
I learnt strong emotional responses of this nature became a flashlight for what my core drivers were. The needs that are interwoven into my being.
This experience taught me that (like most people) I have a core driver that craves love.
When my mate said no because “he didn’t feel like it”. What I really heard was “I don’t love you”.
With this perspective my emotional outburst changes from irrational to understandable.
Discovering this as a core driver blew my mind. I gained clarity on the ‘why’ that sat underneath all my behaviours.
I realised my reckless behaviour in my early 20s wasn’t only due to excessive alcohol consumption (even though it certainly played a factor). I found all the jumping off things and naked stunts led to laughter from friends which equated to greater acceptance in my mind.
It explained why, despite building an impressive portfolio of Jackass-like stunts, I tried to hide it away from my parents. It wasn’t that I didn’t want them involved in my life, I was secretly insecure that I wasn’t making them proud.
And why at work, despite my reputation as a larrikin socially, I became a quiet, hard worker.
It’s so obvious now that this need for love tied a consistent thread under the range of my personas. However, in the moment I would have sworn I was just having fun with my friends, my parents were judgemental and I wanted a good career.
So what’s driving you?
Reflect on a time where you had a strong emotional reaction. Why did you feel this way? Keep asking why until you feel a visceral reaction in your body. Once you feel that, you know you’ve hit a core driver.
The answer may provide you with greater self-understanding than any self-help book ever will.
It certainly did for me.
Fail of the Week:
Due to my concussion over the past two months my options for exercise were severely limited. However, being cramped inside rendered me a three year old with a sugar rush so my release came in the form of electric bike riding (due to the number of hills in Sydney only psychopaths ride a normal bike).
Electric bike riding is perfect for my head - I don’t strain too hard thanks to the motor and I don’t bounce up and down like running.
Well that is unless you crash.
I was exploring a new path which admittedly was designed for walkers, not bikes, but I was curious so I followed it.
When nek minut I found myself like this:
The skinniness of the walking path led me to hit the side of it and my reflexes hitting the breaks, propelled my back tyre into the air.
Fortunately, all that was hurt was my ego.
Until next week,
Cheers,
Nic Hurrell